Coming 4 December!

I’ve finally chosen a drop date for the remastered edition of The Persistence of Memories! It’ll be available on 4 December at Smashwords and soon after at other online sites! I just have a few final tweaks and fixes I need to make, and it’ll be ready to go.

Hope you enjoy it!

A Personal Q&A

Q: So, what have you been up to this week?
A:
Not too much, really. I’ve been on a well-earned vacation and we’ve been taking it day by day. Going for walks, doing a bit of shopping and cleaning, watching a movie (Wildwood, which I highly recommend) or two (we’re going to see Godzilla Minus Zero today), visiting the zoo. And sleeping in, which has definitely helped us relax and rest up.

Q: So…you haven’t been writing, then?
A:
On the contrary, I’ve been keeping up with my daily 750Words. I’m currently doing a little fun personal project on it to get myself back up to speed. As I’ve recently finished up all the work on the Remaster for The Persistence of Memories, the only thing I need to do there is take a little time in the next few days to upload it to Smashwords/Draft2Digital and make sure the layout is up to my standards. (And maybe purchase a few physical author copies just to have them on hand.) The blog entries have been kind of light this week, but that’s by design.

Q: Any idea what you’ll work on next?
A:
Officially, next is the Remaster work for The Balance of Light which is probably going to need a lot of TLC so it might take a while. But on the creative end of things, I’ve got two projects I’m contemplating: a fourth book in the Mendaihu Universe, or a complete rewrite (and I mean complete this time, not a revision like the previous attempts) of Theadia.

Q: Which of course begs the question…what if a new and promising idea surfaces?
A:
As always, it depends. If a standalone idea resonates deeply enough with me that it demands my full attention, it might skip to the front of the line. I don’t see that happening, but I’ll keep my options open.

Q: Obligatory music question: what are you listening to right now during your writing sessions?
A:
In Purgatory by World News is getting some seriously heavy rotation these days. It’s one of my favorite albums of the year right now and I highly recommend it. The new Fontaines DC record Dopamine Chamber is quite excellent as well, as is Mud by Remi Wolf, Common Primitives by Andy Bell (Ride) and Masal, Violins by Blondshell and Ride Lonesome by Beck.

Q: Obligatory cat question: how are the kitties doing?
A:
Jules and Cali are doing just fine, thanks for asking! They’ve been their usual silly selves and have been waking us up at 5am regardless of our sleeping in this week.

Q: Obligatory personal question: how about those election results earlier this week?
A:
WHOOF! Yeah, I’d figured there would be a bit of red-to-blue switching, but I don’t think anyone had any idea there would be this much. I just…kept happening throughout the evening. I’d been in the office working on stuff and A was in the living room constantly keeping me updated. I won’t go into personal detail here, other than that it was a long-awaited and much-needed sea change, and I’m hoping it continues in this positive direction.

Q: Back to writing — what else is on your mind right now?
A:
I keep wanting to get back to journaling but I keep forgetting to because I’ve been distracted by other projects I’ve been working on. It’s not important, but I think it’s something I should get back to, if only just to strengthen the boundaries between my creative work, my personal thoughts and so on. I’m trying to create a stable and workable writing regimen these days, and in the process I remind myself to take it one day at a time. Keep it enjoyable and not worry about what’s not in my control just yet.

Q: Sounds like you’ve been having a good week! Anything else you’d like to add?
A:
Nah, I’m good! I’m back to work next week so I’m thinking I’d better prepare myself for that as well. But I’m not going to stress out over it, though. See you next Monday, then?

Q: Works for me. I’ll bring the tea and apple cider donuts.
A:
Sweet!

MU Chronology: to the warehouse

The above is the main Yankee Candle warehouse building, which opened up for business in April of 2001. My friend Bruce and I were some of the first people offering to test out the brand spankin’ new equipment before it all went live. It’s a huge building that was built to centralize the shipping, receiving, order fulfillment and storage departments all under one roof. We worked in shipping, which is in the top left corner of this picture (where all those trailers are parked in back), with eighteen bays if I recall. The entire right side of that building from this view is multi-level pallet storage, with the receiving docks in the rear as well. I worked in this building from April 2001 up until I left in March of 2005.

This is also the main inspiration for Moulding Warehouse in the Bridgetown Trilogy. I’d actually come up with the idea for that warehouse at our older building south of there on an inventory day during my brief second-shift days, but it was here that I’d solidified the idea and expanded upon it. I remember early on that I pulled a few building managers aside and asked about the specs, explaining my idea of turning the storage bays into a sort of multi-level cubicle hotel of sorts. They were rather amused by my creativity but confirmed that it could actually work as the framework was solid and buried deep into the concrete floor. [Note: the building’s name in the trilogy comes from XTC member Colin Moulding, one of my many Tuckerizations in this universe.]

While revisiting the MU chronology recently, I further realized that the date I started working in this building does in fact line up with when I wrote those scenes about the awakened converging upon Moulding Warehouse and Nehalé Usarai worrying about keeping everything under control. I remember taking my time on A Divison of Souls for fear of rushing it like I had with The Phoenix Effect, so while I was definitely working on it nearly every day from this point onwards, I was hitting probably around five hundred words to begin with. I’d slowly expand on that over the course of writing it, and by the time I started The Persistence of Memories I was aiming more towards a thousand. My favorite thing to do during slow moments of my shift was taking a bit of scrap paper and working out the next few scenes (often with one of those many boxes we shifted as a temporary desk), so that when my nightly writing sessions began I could start immediately.

And for a sense of its vastness, below is a shot of my department from the upper level of the shipping/receiving offices (itself an inspiration for the warehouse mezzanine scenes in the trilogy) from a video I found online sometime ago. Our job was to build pallets from the boxes that came down those chutes, wrap them up in plastic (the wrapper machines were underneath the chutes) and get them into the trailers (the bays are at the wall out of shot to the right). This seems to be filmed in the summer when it was relatively light, as this area would be filled to the brim and full of chaos during the Q4 holiday season. It would take us a good couple of minutes to walk from our department to the front of the building when we left for the day. This is why Moulding comes across as an incredibly large warehouse where several characters could either find privacy or gather together in large numbers with room to spare.

It was certainly an exhausting and very noisy job at times, especially during the holiday season, but at the same time it was an enjoyable one that kept me constantly moving instead of sedentary. I was blessed by the fact that it gave me all sorts of time to think about my writing with very little interruption, and a schedule that provided me with a broad length of personal time to work with. It’s an extremely productive benchmark that’s been tough to reach ever since, but these days I’ve been doing pretty good at getting close.

Sunday catch-up

I usually write these entries on Sunday afternoons after we get back from our morning jaunt around the neighborhood — the farmers’ market, a coffee run, lunch ordering, what have you — and while doing errands around the house like the laundry. I like doing it this way because I have a lot more time to think about what to write without worrying about running out of time to work on my WIPs. I have nothing else to worry about as most of it is either already done or in progress. I’ll also clean out my email inboxes, run the PC cleaning software if needed, and of course leave time for giving much-demanded attention to our two cats.

I think of it as my Sunday catch-up time. And now that I think of it, it’s also a bit like how I handled Sundays as a teenager: it’s when I got most of my homework done as well. Yeah, I was totally a do-it-at-the-last-minute kid, even the term papers and projects I should have started weeks before. But while it was a terrible habit then, it’s actually a perfect one for me now. The only assignments I work on now are my own, and I can certainly crank them out if and when needed. I spend an hour or so working on an entry or two for this and Walk in Silence while I update the apps on my phone and ereader and the laundry finishes up, another half hour on the 750 Words, so by the time the early evening rolls around, I can focus just on my current WIP (in this case, the Remaster of The Persistence of Memories).

And maybe listen to some of the new music releases I’ve recently downloaded, of course.

It doesn’t always work out that way of course, but it’s nice when it all falls into place and I get all sorts of things done and out of the way. Makes the rest of the week just a little less stressful!

Songs from the Eden Cycle 1: Annotated

Recently I’ve been visiting the early days of the Mendaihu Universe project, specifically when I’d started writing it mid-March of 1997. I’ve talked about the background of this story quite often here, but I’ve sometimes commented about its influences only in a passive way. When I started The Phoenix Effect, it was going to be more dark and intense than its previous incarnation as True Faith. And I can safely say that the primary influences of this version were the movies/series Bladerunner, Gall Force, Bubblegum Crisis, and Johnny Mnemonic, and the Masamune Shirow mangas The Ghost in the Shell, Dominion and Appleseed.

Then of course there’s the music. Nearly all of my writing projects have dedicated mixtapes and/or playlists — yes, even the juvenilia and the trunked ideas — and Phoenix was no different. At the time, this new story was still considered part of a much larger extended universe I then called the Eden Cycle, with vague outlines for several books spanning multiple storylines and eras. [That in itself was inspired by the Star Wars expanded universe.] Mind you, I was still nowhere near the write every day goal I was aiming towards, so by June I was only a few longhand chapters in, sessions squeezed in before my shift at HMV or in the evening after dinner.

The first volume of Songs from the Eden Cycle was created for two reasons. One, I needed all the inspiration I could get, and ‘soundtrack’ mixtapes always worked for me; and two, I was heading out on a weeklong multi-state road trip to visit a good friend of mine, and what better way to think about my project than while I’m on the road? I may have only gotten one writing session in during that trip, but I’m sure I gave that mix a few repeat plays at the time.

Songs from the Eden Cycle Vol 1, created June 1997 (likely later in the month).

SIDE 1

  1. Poe, “Hello [Band Version]”. When I first started making the mixtape in the back room of the store, I knew this was going to be the first track because it had inspired the new direction for the Vigil project. Plus, it’s a banger! I liked that the lyrics were an obvious nod to cyberpunk, and to my ears a nod specifically to Johnny Mnemonic and Neuromancer. At the time, Phoenix‘s plot contained the idea of spirits with the ability to switch bodies, including cybernetic clones. The “phoenix” part of the title then was meant to evoke an idea of being reborn, specifically in a violent way. The opening of Phoenix is almost exactly the same as it is in A Division of Souls, only that the Awakening ritual was originally a catastrophic ‘ring of fire’ explosion at the Tower. [Note: Spotify doesn’t have this version available, so the original album version took its place.]
  2. Failure, “Heliotropic”. There’s no specific scene or idea for this song, only that I was listening to Fantastic Planet quite a bit by this time and this was added more as a vibe than anything else. The heavy and distorted bass and the thundering drums to me evoked a grimy night city scene a la Bladerunner. B-Town was never planned to be all grime and grimness, mind you; just certain parts of it to make sure there’s a visible line between the haves and the have-nots.
  3. U2, “Mofo”. I was also listening to Pop a lot at this time too; I loved the album even despite the critics hating it. I loved the almost non-human sound coming from this song, which hinted at that ‘phoenix’ idea; the story at the time had these newly awakened spirits hiding inside cybernetic bodies just this side of the uncanny valley (another Bladerunner influence).
  4. David Bowie, “Dead Man Walking”. Another “phoenix” idea I played around with: what happens to the original bodies once the spirit leaves and enters a new one? What remains? They were a husk at most, and a possible target for a different and malevolent spirit at worst. [I hint at this in The Persistence of Memories when Caren and Poe meet Saisshalé for the first time.] I was also listening to Earthling quite a bit, pleasantly surprised that I’d finally found a non-greatest hits Bowie record that I really liked.
  5. Psykosonik, “Need to Die”. This CD was given to me by a coworker at the record store who was really into the whole electronica and darkwave thing. He liked it all, even though he was not a clubgoer. This darkwave band was similar to bands like VNV Nation and Front Line Assembly, which I also gravitated towards. I liked this laid back groove and thought this song fit the mix. [Note: I would only find out years later that one of the band’s members, Ted Beale, would end up being the infamous Vox Day. I keep the two as separate as I possibly can.]
  6. Live, “Lakini’s Juice”. Secret Samadhi was their weird album, I think. It was the follow up to the hugely successful Throwing Copper, and while there are elements of their heart-on-sleeve earnestness they’ve always had, it’s a much darker affair. This was the first single and definitely a left turn for them: grimy and gritty and unsettling. I thought it fit the flow and mood of the mix nicely.
  7. Elysian Fields, “Lady in the Lake”. Bleeding Cedar was one of the early promo CDs I’d gotten from the store, and I was taken in by the band’s sultry goth sound. It was like listening to a much darker version of Mazzy Star in a way, feeling like the aural equivalent of a ghost story. While “Jack in the Box” was the single, this was the track that appealed to me. Lyrically it doesn’t quite fit but the vibe is perfect.
  8. Moby, “That’s When I Reach for My Revolver”. Despite my wondering why he decided to cover Mission of Burma for his non-electronic ‘punk’ album Animal Rights, I kind of liked this take on one of my favorite Boston-centric songs, as he manages to retain the meaning and energy of the track. Why here? I think partly because WFNX was playing it a lot at the time and I needed to fill out the last part of Side 1. It does sort of fit the mood of Vigil’s take on the situation: if someone has to take the reins and get shit done, it’s definitely going to be them.
  9. The Verve Pipe, “Veneer”. I’d loved the Villains album and had seen them live at Avalon in Boston in May, where I learned the story behind this dreamlike track — driving alone on a deserted Michigan highway while high as a kite. Hearing it in its proper context made me absolutely love the track. In the context of Phoenix, I think this was how I thought a newly ‘awakened’ spirit would feel: completely out of sorts and confused, maybe akin to being high.

SIDE 2

  1. Richard Einhorn & Anonymous 4, “Exlamavit (from Voices of Light)”. I was obsessed with this album in the latter half of 1996, having heard it on an NPR station as I was driving into Boston one night. Einhorn wrote it as a soundtrack to the 1928 silent film The Passion of Joan of Arc. It intrigued me because it was the first modern orchestral piece that caught my interest, and reminded me of my favorite Dead Can Dance moments. This intro piece fit perfectly with the “ring of fire” moment in Phoenix.
  2. Pulp, “Common People”. This was a good year or two old and I was passingly familiar with it but it hadn’t resonated with me until around this time when I finally got what the band was about. I’d been listening to the store copy off and on and knew this was the big hit. It might not completely fit in with the story idea, but the vibe of distrusting those who mock or hate you fit in perfectly. It kind of fits Vigil’s vibe as well.
  3. Sponge, “Isolation”. I’d also been listening to the Working Class Hero John Lennon tribute album quite a bit at the time. It’s a song about Lennon dealing with the darker side of fame and feeling isolated despite being constantly surrounded. While the original from the Plastic Ono Band album is more plaintive and laid bare, this version is more pissed off, and it works alongside the above song with that feeling of social disconnection. [The tribute album is not on Spotify and is thus not on the playlist above.]
  4. The Offspring, “Gone Away”. This song was super popular on WFNX (does anyone remember the first single off this album?), and it sort of continues the whole feeling of social disconnect, this time from a deeply emotional point of view. It inspired a possible idea of a recently awakened character who felt this deeply yet didn’t quite understand where it was coming from yet.
  5. Filter, “Hey Man, Nice Shot”. There were actually a good couple of songs I thought fit the opening ‘ring of fire’ scene, and this was the more ‘violent’ one I came up with, fitting perfectly with my still-occasional use of Miami Vice style of writing. And I can never pass up a song that perfectly uses the quiet –> LOUD dynamic.
  6. Failure, “Daylight”. Even then I’m pretty sure I saw this song as an “ending credits scene” track, because it has such an epic coda that just builds and builds and leaves you breathless at the end. I’m also sure even then I pictured a hard cut to black when the drums and guitars kick in after the last verse. This is the first of many mixtapes where this song makes an appearance.
  7. U2, “Wake Up Dead Man”. Could this be a denouement scene song after all that? Perhaps? It’s near the end of Pop, after all the louder and bigger songs, and it evokes a feeling of exhaustion after all the pomp and noise. It also fits pretty well after “Daylight” — while the former song is the moment where something life-altering happens in the story, this song is the moment right after when one suddenly realizes what its consequences are.
  8. Jamiroquai, “Virtual Insanity”. I’ll be honest, this was more of an “I need one more song to finish this mix off” song, but it also fits the theme and the flow as another ‘end credits’ track. In my mind it does somehow fit in with the feeling of something life-altering happening, and now here we are having to deal with the fallout.

Not bad for a first volume, and it got a ton of play over the next several years. I’d be making two more volumes by the end of the year, with a fourth and then-final one made late in 1998 when I was working on the transcription and revision. Several of the tracks on these early volumes have had direct influence on The Phoenix Effect. [I will talk more about these in future entries here.]

A few variations would show up over the next few years, but in 2018 I’d revive the Songs from the Eden Cycle series as a way to keep the universe in mind. The most current one is Volume 10, created in late 2024.

Remaster Status: on schedule

While I haven’t decided on a specific release date for the Remastered Edition for The Persistence of Memories, I can say that I’m still on schedule. I’m about halfway through, which is where I expected to be at this point. Not bad for a month and a half’s worth of work! It does help that I had an easy time of this one to begin with, so there aren’t too many issues to focus on. If I keep up with this schedule, I should be ready for a late fall release. I’ll have a more concrete date in mind once I get closer to the end.

I’m thinking, though, that if I do start the RE for The Balance of Light in 2027, that one might take some time to finish. It was the toughest of the three and I think it still needs a bit more TLC to make it a better book. Nothing as terrible as the original revision when I first self-published it. (I cut a lot from that one, quite possibly 15-30k…the final draft was a beast.) There’s also the fact that I’d like to think about what I’d like to work on next, be it a return to Theadia or finally starting on the next Mendaihu Universe book. Either way…we shall see.

For now, I’m just going to focus on the present.

Back to normal

Today marks the last of five days in a row of my oddball day job schedule as the person whose job I was covering has come back from their three-week vacation. It’s taken a lot out of me and I’m sore and exhausted most of the time, but I survived intact. The trick was to purposely not run myself ragged at top speed every single moment. There were a few tense moments where I had to hide away in the bookkeeping booth to wind myself down a bit, but for the most part I kept as much as I could under control.

I’m even kind of surprised I managed to get a lot done with the Remaster for The Persistence of Memories! Then again, this is (a) my favorite book in the trilogy and (b) the one I feel is the best of the three. Most of the work has been the occasional spot-clean and rewording a few clunky sentences here and there. I’ll give it another reread once I’m done, and hopefully have it ready for re-release by the end of the year!

But yeah…after today, I’ll be enjoying a quiet four-day reprieve, and I’m looking forward to getting some remastering work done!

Clarity

[This was also posted at my Dreamwidth blog yesterday as something that’s been on my mind lately.]

As I get older I find myself seeking clarity more and more. The problem with doing that when I was younger was that I was still stuck looking at that in terms of extreme opposites: I’m either Totally Locked In or I’m Completely Disconnected. I either have All The Feels or I’m Cynical and Don’t Give a Shit. I knew that wasn’t want I wanted, bur nor did I want to keep pretending that I could find a happy medium where I could be all at the same time. That just became emotionally and mentally exhausting.

Lately I’ve been thinking about it in terms of my own levels of media consumption. I’m not exactly talking about avoiding the online doomscrolling, though that has often been a problem. It’s more along the lines of remembering when I could consume with clarity. That is, like what I like to whatever degree, ignore what doesn’t resonate with me, and for the love of pie it’s not a contest with everyone else in the universe. Social media is fine if you set your own boundaries and catch yourself when you’re slipping into obsession, or the fear of missing out.

That was my issue: I’d set those boundaries and then completely forgot about them because my brain is wired to obsess. [Thus my ridiculously large music library.] I realized this when the pandemic started and made inroads to rewire my head a bit. It took a few years considering it had gotten out of control like weeds in an untended garden, but I got there eventually. There’s always weeding to be done, but it’s much easier to do now.

And now I’m at a point where I can do a bit of fine-tuning. With age and experience — and a rewired brain — I can say, ‘okay, this is where I want my head to be at, so let’s head in that direction.’ Listening to my favorite music from the past is helping, because I’m purposely not doing it only as a way to reminisce. I’m currently listening to the stuff from 2002-2003 while I work on the Remaster Edition of The Persistence of Memories. I’ve been posting the Thirty Years On series at the music blog and talking about 1996 (and continuing into 1997 because why not). And the long-game reason for doing this has to do with rewiring how I listen to current music: to once more listen to new releases that resonate with me, and to have it stay with me for more than just a few months. I know it can be done because there have been current releases that have done that (GIFT’s Illuminator album, for instance). And slowly, I’m starting to reclaim that.

It’s definitely an ongoing process, but it’s one that I’m able to control if I keep at it.

Back to work

Okay, I feel much better now.

I managed to survive six early starts in a row by way of keeping my energy levels to a minimum. No going above and beyond unless absolutely necessary. Knowing when to say no or not having the ability to take on yet another Thing To Do and letting them know about it. And not pushing myself at home, either, other than sitting down and working on the Persistence remaster. The two days off were well-earned and spent, catching up on errands and writing stuff. And thankfully the upcoming work schedule is a much more manageable off-and-on that offers me more of a respite.

Now if I can only get it together enough to post more over here! I’m going to make it a point to have something up for Monday, as thankfully have Sunday off, and Sundays are perfect for prepping blog entries ahead of time.

See you then!