Year Begin: Heading into 2026

Let’s start with the things I’d like to do in 2026:

— I would like to complete and release Theadia next year, most likely during third or fourth quarter of the year. I still need to finish it, and I also need to revise it and figure out a cover for it. I’ll spend maybe a couple of weeks flitting around on the photo sites to see if I can find something that works, but I’d also like to look into seeing if I can commission an artist for it. I spent a good number of years working on this project and I’m quite proud of it, so I’d rather not drop the ball and half-ass the end result. It’s an important story for me, and I’d love for you all to read it and enjoy it.

— Will I have time to work on the Remaster for The Persistence of Memories, as originally planned? That’s a good question. I think I will, considering this one needed the least amount of work. If I recall, most of the work it did need will be for clarity or tightening up. I also might give it a newer cover. While it looks good on the physical copy, it doesn’t quite translate as well digitally. I’ll have to do some more work on that. I think I pulled one or two pictures back in the day that I liked, but I’ll see if I can find something similar that’s much more intriguing.

— I’m not going to worry too much about coming up with any new projects, especially since I have the two above to focus on. However, my plan is to keep my options open via the 750Words site. Whether it’s outtakes, MU-related ideas or just something that crossed my mind that day, I’d like to see where that takes me. I think I’ve come to the point in my creative career where I don’t feel too worried about running out of ideas, because I’ve proven to myself that was never the case. It’s always been about outer frustrations intruding into my creative life, whether it was job related or personal, and I’ve learned how to keep them separate. It still takes time and practice to keep that in place, but I’m aware of it and that’s the most important thing.

— Again, I do plan to expand my creative outlets by returning to art and music. If I’ve learned anything over the years, it’s in the approach. I tend to freeze up if I force myself to do anything creative because it either feels like an assignment or an impenetrable wall. And if I approach it from that angle, then I first have to cast my creative mind aside to work past it, thus defeating the purpose. So how am I going to work this out in the new year? By taking a much simpler route: just pick up the tool and see where it takes me. It doesn’t always have to come from inspiration, sometimes it will just come from interest or curiosity. I’m curious to see what I can come up with on my guitar if I used alternate tunings. I’d like to see if I can get better at comic art. The approach is all about wanting to do it, not forcing myself to do it.

— And on a personal level, how do I want to live my life? I’ve made so many changes over the years, positive ones that needed to be taken, and now I’m at a point where I can move forward with the least amount of resistance. Where do I want to go? What do I want to do? What have I wanted to do? It doesn’t feel nearly as daunting as it used to, and that’s by design. I acknowledge the work it took that got me to this point, and now I’m allowed to keep moving in the right direction.

**

Sure, I’ve had my down moments. Times when I fell, times when I broke. But in 2025, I picked myself back up enough times that it no longer feels painful. I still feel the frustration, but now I know I can accept it each time and keep moving despite those down times. I can face the fears now. I can face the uncertainty. And that makes looking forward so much easier and clearer.

Here’s to wishing everyone a special and uplifting 2026!

Year End: Moving Forward

I’ll be honest, I’ve spent most of December half-assing it.

I mean, I’ve gotten a lot done with Theadia. I managed to not only figure out a snag that was bothering me for the last few months, but the solution was so simple that it feels like a huge weight was taken off my shoulders. This in turn is helping me get through the various WRITE THIS LATER scenes a lot quicker, much to my relief.

I’ve been pretty consistent with the blog entries here and at Walk in Silence. And I’ve also been doing a really good job of keeping up with my daily words at 750Words, with only the occasional “cheat day” (in which I paste an older entry from this blog and comment what’s changed since then) here and there. I’ve been doing that on purpose as a dry run to get myself in shape for consistency starting next year.

Thing is, I probably could be doing more. I could be further along with Theadia, and I definitely need to get my butt in gear with the remaster for The Persistence of Memories. I haven’t picked up my guitars in a bit, I’ve been forgetting to update the personal journal, and I definitely haven’t done any art in far too long.

Still, I’m not about to beat myself up about all that. Not anymore, anyway. I’ve retaught myself not to focus on the failures, and instead focus on picking myself up and continuing when it eventually does happen. Call it a bit of self-awareness, a bit of Zen balance, whatever it might be. I know, I’ve tried this approach in the past and it always ends in tears, but that’s the point: accept that failures occur, pick myself up and dust myself off, and keep going.

I do have plans for 2026, of course. But that will be in the final entry, coming next Monday! See you then!

Writing again…sort of

I think it’s time to start writing again. The itch to do so has been constant lately.

Even though I’m working on Theadia (and doing a soft-start for the remaster of The Persistence of Memories), I’ve been itching to just write something new. I’m not sure what just yet, and I’m not going to force it. That, and I’ve sort of resurrected some of my writing habits again — noting word count in the small black moleskine calendar notebook, for instance. I’m not doing it every day of course, I’m merely entering it every now and again when the thought and the temptation strikes.

I know I talk about this here every now and again, and I admit sometimes I’m like a broken record (a skipping cd? a corrupted FLAC?) but it’s been an ongoing process that needs constant adjustment and tweaking. We writers sometimes get all meta about our process and it’s usually because we’re trying to figure out why our processes are the way they are, why they sometimes no longer work, and what we need to do to change them. That kind of thing never ends, I’m afraid, but it’s something I’m used to at this point.

As always, it’s just a matter of doing it. Once I start, the rest comes easier.

That time of year again

It’s been a bit over three months since we moved into our New Digs, and things are finally settling and falling back into place. I might still have to remind myself that those month-end payments aren’t for rent anymore but mortgage, but other than that I’m happy that we’re here. We might be slightly further away from the shopping corridors but we’re two blocks from our community garden plot, a block away from a major bus route as well as a very large public park, and the neighborhood is thankfully much more peaceful. (Yes, even during recess for the kidlets at the school across the way.)

This is good timing, as it’s that time of year where I feel the need to change things up. And you know how I am in autumn: excited about the new music releases and contemplative about where I am and where I want to be. I’ve already made a lot of positive changes over the last few months — with room for improvement, of course — so it’s really just a matter of doing it at this point. Or not doing, depending on the situation. Some habits I find I just do not need nor want anymore. Some habits I’d like to revisit once more.

And what about writing? Well, the remaster of A Division of Souls is out and away, and I’m thinking of starting in on the remaster of The Persistence of Memories pretty soon. I’m also focusing on Theadia and it’s still looking good and on schedule for release sometime next year. But I can’t help but think: I’ve got a journal and a notebook gathering dust in my satchel right now, and my 750Words sign-in remains woefully ignored. I mean, I’ve worked on multiple stories at that same time before, so this is nothing new. I can certainly play around with writing extremely rough drafts of new ideas while spending most of my creative energies on the two main projects. And in the process, probably disconnect from a few IRL things that I don’t need to hyperfocus on.

And what better time to do it than during the season that works best for me?

It’s that time again!

Come one, come all for some free e-books! Smashwords and Draft2Digital are having their Summer/Winter Sale! ALL SEVEN of my books are here for free for the entirety of July! You know you want ’em!

You can find my books right here at this link!

Yes, this includes:
A Division of Souls (The Bridgetown Trilogy, Book 1) [2015]**
The Persistence of Memories (The Bridgetown Trilogy, Book 2) [2016]
The Balance of Light (The Bridgetown Trilogy, Book 3) [2017]
Meet the Lidwells! A Rock ‘n’ Roll Family Memoir [2018]
In My Blue World [2019]
Diwa & Kaffi [2023]
Queen Ophelia’s War [2024]

** NEWS! A Division of Souls will be re-released in ‘Remastered’ form for its tenth anniversary in September!

Do you love an epic metaphysical sci-fi adventure? Try the Bridgetown Trilogy!
A big fan of music memoirs? Meet the Lidwells is a fictional nod to one of my favorite genres!
Enjoy magical girls and time travel fantasy? Try out In My Blue World!
In the mood for a nice Ghibli-esque hopepunk story about best friends? You’ll love Diwa & Kaffi!
Looking for a fantasy story about self-discovery? Queen Ophelia’s War is for you!

And who knows, maybe I’ll finally get Theadia on this list, once I finally finish the dang thing! Heh.

Thank you for reading!!

Just another reminder…!

It’s that time of the year again! ALL SEVEN of my books are here for free from now until the end of the year! You know you want ’em!

You can find my books right here at this link!

Yes, this includes:
A Division of Souls (The Bridgetown Trilogy, Book 1) [2015]
The Persistence of Memories (The Bridgetown Trilogy, Book 2) [2016]
The Balance of Light (The Bridgetown Trilogy, Book 3) [2017]
Meet the Lidwells! A Rock ‘n’ Roll Family Memoir [2018]
In My Blue World [2019]
Diwa & Kaffi [2023]
Queen Ophelia’s War [2024]

Do you love an epic metaphysical sci-fi adventure? Try the Bridgetown Trilogy!
A big fan of music memoirs? Meet the Lidwells is a fictional nod to one of my favorite genres!
Enjoy magical girls and time travel fantasy? Try out In My Blue World!
In the mood for a nice Ghibli-esque hopepunk story about best friends? You’ll love Diwa & Kaffi!
Looking for a fantasy story about self-discovery? Queen Ophelia’s War is for you!

And who knows, maybe I’ll finally get Theadia on this list next year, once I finally finish the dang thing! Heh.

Thank you for reading!!

What Your Soul Sings

Massive Attack’s 100th Window came out in early 2003 when I was writing The Persistence of Memories, and the track “What Your Soul Sings” was the standout track for me; it was the first time I’d heard Sinéad O’Connor’s voice in some time, even though she’d been dropping albums here and there.

The message of the song — listen to and trust your inner self, it knows what it needs and wants — resonated deeply for me, and it became one of the most important central themes of not just TPoM but the entire trilogy. It’s what keeps Denni from faltering and doubting herself. It’s what keeps Caren moving even when she feels lost. It’s what keeps Poe focused on what he truly believes in. Every character learns that their true anchor, what keeps them from spiraling into chaos and doubt, is the calm soul within.

Even today I keep it as a sort of personal mantra, one I occasionally need to remind myself of: follow what makes your soul sing.

Thank you for the music and the vision, Sinéad.

Don’t be afraid
Open your mouth to say
Say what your soul sings to you

Walking Through

I’ve been thinking about the Bridgetown Trilogy lately, and also of one of my top five favorite scenes I wrote for it. This one in particular is the very last ‘shot’ of Book 2, The Persistence of Memories, in which our heroes are about to change their fates in the most quiet and peaceful of ways:

*

It was closing in on nine o’clock when Christine’s car pulled up to the front of Moulding Warehouse.  They climbed out and stood in front of the main entrance, its door open and waiting.  They looked within and saw bustling movement, last-minute preparations being made.  There were many people here that he knew, if not by name or face then by spirit signature, all with a singular mission: to prevent a war from taking place.

Had it really come to this?  A spiritual war to gain control of an artificial intelligence?  Shirai wasn’t just the Tower AI but a technical construct that housed an actual Gharné soul.  She was one of a kind, created by a Mendaihu and protected by a small band of jacker punks.  And the Shenaihu wanted her badly.

Inside the warehouse, the floor was brightly lit and the air was warm, a stark contrast to the cold air and the darkness outside.  About a hundred feet in he saw seven people standing patiently, waiting for them.  He could sense them better than he could see them, but he knew who they were.  Denni stood in the center, a big smile on her face and her spirit brimming with joy.  She held Caren’s hand tightly.

“No turning back now,” Poe said, and turned to his left.  Sheila stared at the doorway with the same steel intensity she’d always shown during investigations.  She noticed his glance and turned to face him.

“I’m ready,” she said.

He nodded, and turned to his right.  Nick still looked skeptical, but he’d already made his choice.  He understood his role and its importance of what was to come, even if he had no idea what was going to happen.  He felt an immense pride in helping the Mendaihu, the people who had saved him a number of times during his tenure as a BMPD officer.  He felt at peace with his surroundings, despite its chaos.  For him, the most important thing was that he felt at home.

“Once more unto the breach, dear friends,” he said. “Once more.”

Poe snorted out a laugh.  The last thing he’d expected from Nick was for him to quote Shakespeare.  It was a much needed dose of levity.

Christine, standing a few feet behind Poe, felt more nervous than scared.  She’d faced many demons before, and had simply chosen to view this as yet another.  She trusted Poe as her brother and her spiritual sibling, and was willing to go forth and witness it all, both good and bad, if that was to be her own fate.  She did not need to say anything; Poe had sensed everything she was thinking and feeling at this moment.  He felt that warmth in his heart, knowing she would be with him throughout it all.

Sheila and Nick looked at each other, nodded, and walked forward.  Just as they approached the door, Nick stepped aside and let her walk through the door first, theatrically waving her through.  She laughed at his ridiculousness and slapped him on the arm as she passed by.  When he walked through, she took his arm, and together they continued towards the waiting crew.

Poe stood there for a few moments, waiting.  Christine came up from behind him and stood to his left, still looking at the open door.

“Are you ready for this?” she asked.

“Was I ever?” he said.  “I’ll have to be.”

“At least you’re honest,” she grinned.  “Should I…?”

He offered his arm.  “I’ll walk you to the door.  I have to be the last one in.”

She offered him a weak smile.

“Don’t worry, it’s not like you and I are getting married.”

Christine let out a nervous laugh.  “You ass!  This is serious!”

“I know,” he said.  “That’s why I said it.  Shall we?”

She nodded.  “Here we go.”

They walked slowly.  All the movement within the warehouse had slowed to a stop, at least temporarily.  He took a single nervous breath, trying to ignore the fact that five thousand or so Mendaihu, Shenaihu and cho-nyhndah were in that warehouse right now, had their eyes or their senses trained on that one door frame.

They came to the door, and he stopped.  Wordlessly, Christine let go of his arm, leaned over and kissed him on the cheek, and nodded twice.  Pride, he thought, as he sensed her emotions.  She was proud of him, proud to have known him, proud to have been able to work with him for so many years.  She walked through, and kept walking until she’d joined the others.  She stood just apart from them, not officially part of this circle, but an observer and a participant.  They were all waiting for this moment.

He felt a small prick of cold touch him on the back of the neck, just as he was about to walk through.  He felt it again almost immediately, and he looked up.  A light snow shower had just arrived, creating a ghostly cone underneath the spotlight.  One flake hit him on his eyelash and he lifted his hand to brush it away. 

Snow, he thought with a smile.  The Rain of Light blesses me tonight.

“Here lies fate,” he said, took a deep breath, and walked through the door.

*

I use the door metaphor at the end of all three books, each one with Alec Poe being the one to walk through. Why him, and not Denni or Caren? At the time I wrote A Division of Souls I chose him because it felt right. He’s the character of true balance, both emotionally and spiritually. He’s not perfect by a long shot — the scene just before his exit in ADoS is a bitter argument with Caren where he meant well but said exactly the wrong thing — but that’s the whole point of his character. He’s good and bad, perfect and imperfect, strong and vulnerable, intelligent and deeply confused. Many people’s fate rests on his shoulders, whether he likes it or not.

In The Persistence of Memories, he’s the last to enter the warehouse. Technically he didn’t have to be, but it was his own choice: he knew everyone depended on his protection and safety, and it felt right to have everyone in the same place where they had his full attention. I felt the snowfall was a nice touch as well, as it was another metaphor that threads through the trilogy: the flow of ‘rain’ that signifies changes they cannot avoid. Besides, that was one of my favorite things as a kid: looking up at the snow falling at night, illuminated as it entered the light of street lamps. Snowfall mutes all sorts of extraneous noise, giving the area a startlingly peaceful moment in time, and that was Poe’s moment of peace in that story, right at the very end.

I suppose this is one of the reasons I enjoy the winter season, even though I am extremely glad I don’t have to shovel or drive in the white stuff anymore, now that I live in San Francisco. It’s that moment of quiet Zen in an otherwise chaotic world, where I can allow myself some time in contemplation, whether of the day’s events or the year’s. Or of my life to date.

Utilizing that time structure of year’s end to take stock before moving forward once more, with a clearer mind and a stronger heart.