Category: On Writing

Almost six years…?

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Has it really been almost six years I’ve been working on Theadia…? More to the point, how is it that I’m not freaked out that I’m still working on this one project and NOT feeling like a failure for taking so dang long?

To be honest, however, I think it comes with maturity and patience. The obvious reason I was able to turn around my last few novels so quickly was that it was actually a two-year, two-project schedule: one written while working on the editing and release of another. [It also helped that those novels were not epic projects like the Bridgetown Trilogy or Theadia, but shorter stories that didn’t need several hours of prep, work and so on.] Still, I’m glad to say I’m on the back end of this one and I hope to get it out to y’all on the back half of this year.

It’s interesting, though, comparing it to the time I spent working on the Mendaihu Universe. Back during the Belfry days I purposely didn’t give myself a set deadline because I knew this trilogy would be done when it got done. On the one hand I did kind of feel like I was lagging behind every other writer my age out there who was already seeing their works in print, but on the other hand I often reminded myself that I was doing this for me only. Being a successful (or even semi-successful) (or even having some random readers at that) was a goal, but not THE goal. I focused on wanting to tell the stories I wanted to tell, and allowing myself to do it the way I wanted to do it.

These days I don’t really mind that it’s taking me this long to release this story, because I know that doing it right means not rushing it.

Oh, this should work perfectly

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Every now and again I’ll figure out a long-standing block in my current project, and in the process, I’ll be of two minds about it: one, that this unexpectedly clears the path for everything else to run smoothly…and two, that it’ll be a hell of a lot more work than expected. I suppose it’s the variant on the angel and devil on your shoulders bit, really. You feel thrilled that this one problem has finally gone away, but you don’t want to fully trust it just yet.

This has happened twice recently with Theadia, actually. Late last month I’d come to the conclusion that the problem I’d had with a certain character had nothing to do with their actions or what I needed them to do…it was that the character didn’t work. They were just…boring the hell out of me. I hated writing them and initially thought it was because it was a scene I ultimately would not need. That didn’t quite feel right to me, however. The clarity came when I decided that maybe I should have their actions be played by a character I had a bit more interest in but had woefully underused. And LO! It actually worked! These new passages are still a bit weak and in need of revision, but I’m not too worried about that — right now I just want to get the scenes done and written.

The second time was just a week or so ago, when I FINALLY came up with a plausible ending for the novel. This was just like The Balance of Light, in that I knew how I wanted the story to end, but I wasn’t exactly sure how I was going to get there. Thankfully there was no years-long block this time, only a general I’ll get to it when I get to it avoidance. Suffice it to say, I happened to have the day off then, and allowed myself to ruminate over this bit of clarity for a bit to work it out. After about an hour or two, I had a pretty good idea of how I was going to play this out.

As of this moment, I am focusing mostly on the first revelation, as they are the main character of nearly all the ‘WRITE THIS LATER’ scenes I’d skipped over the last year or so. This is actually working for the best, as I’m able to expand on this new character organically, just like I had with the other mains. And once that is taken care of, I can finally finish the novel properly.

And everything will fall into place perfectly.

I hope.

Year End: Moving Forward

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I’ll be honest, I’ve spent most of December half-assing it.

I mean, I’ve gotten a lot done with Theadia. I managed to not only figure out a snag that was bothering me for the last few months, but the solution was so simple that it feels like a huge weight was taken off my shoulders. This in turn is helping me get through the various WRITE THIS LATER scenes a lot quicker, much to my relief.

I’ve been pretty consistent with the blog entries here and at Walk in Silence. And I’ve also been doing a really good job of keeping up with my daily words at 750Words, with only the occasional “cheat day” (in which I paste an older entry from this blog and comment what’s changed since then) here and there. I’ve been doing that on purpose as a dry run to get myself in shape for consistency starting next year.

Thing is, I probably could be doing more. I could be further along with Theadia, and I definitely need to get my butt in gear with the remaster for The Persistence of Memories. I haven’t picked up my guitars in a bit, I’ve been forgetting to update the personal journal, and I definitely haven’t done any art in far too long.

Still, I’m not about to beat myself up about all that. Not anymore, anyway. I’ve retaught myself not to focus on the failures, and instead focus on picking myself up and continuing when it eventually does happen. Call it a bit of self-awareness, a bit of Zen balance, whatever it might be. I know, I’ve tried this approach in the past and it always ends in tears, but that’s the point: accept that failures occur, pick myself up and dust myself off, and keep going.

I do have plans for 2026, of course. But that will be in the final entry, coming next Monday! See you then!

Year End: Moving On

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Sure, I could use the classic phrase I’m too old for this sh*t in regards to some of the more frustrating things that have happened over the past year. But really, I’m not nearly as cynical as that. Despite being firmly Gen-X, I never completely slid into full-on cynicism because I always felt it was an easy way out: writing something off by saying it was never good in the first place. It just didn’t ring true to me.

It’s true, I’ve had a few frustrating things happen here and there this year, and yes, I may have overreacted to some degree. But I’m not writing any of that off, far from it. I’m just choosing to acknowledge it and move on. Not every single event in my life needs to be a conflict that needs to be faced or resolved. Sometimes it just is what it is, and I have to adjust accordingly. I might have to make some changes, but they will be changes made my way and not out of frustration or necessity.

If anything comes with age for me, I think it’s that I’ve refined how I utilize my sense of patience. Back in my 20s I used to semi-joke I was cursed with a tremendous amount of it, primarily because it was the only reaction I could have most of the time, whether due to finances, emotional reaction, or just the situation I found myself in. Some years later I learned how to voice those frustrations, and at times I could be too vocal about it. It took me a while to find a level that wasn’t pathetic or reactionary.

It was all about balance, really. And that’s how I’ve been living since then.

Right now I know there are some things I can fix, and other things I can’t. But I know I am not chained to the places or situations I find myself in these days. It’s a matter of being able to think outside the box instead, and figuring out how to sidestep that particular obstacle and still move forward. It’s true, much of this I’ve inserted into the various characters in Theadia; many of them are just tired of doing it the old way and failing every time, and are looking for alternate ways to resolve their various conflicts. Thus their repeated mantra: if you could…would you do the right thing?

I think in 2026, this is how I’m going to try to think about my writing. While I still have a few things on the backburner waiting to be started, I’m feeling as though I’ve kept a lot of them there not out of a severe case of the Don’t Wannas, but more out of a rational sense that they may not be worth working on at this time. They might be good stories, just that I’m just not feeling the excitement about them. I’m pretty sure I’ll be finally trunking them for good pretty soon.

It’s time to move on.

Year End: Moving

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On any given day at work, I’ll walk at least two miles during my shift. Some days I’ll even walk closer to five if it’s busy. You’d think I don’t do much walking considering the hours I spend at the front end registers, but I do a lot more than just checking some days. I might be shopping for online customers. I might have to head to the receiving dock (in which I need to walk to the rear of the store, down a very long hallway, around a corner and past several shelves of backstock) for one thing or another. Or I may just be the lucky courtesy clerk that needs to head outside and round up the carts. Even on the days when I’m a bookkeeper, I certainly get my steps in. And I’ve been doing a LOT of walking at work.

If anything, I’m glad I’m nowhere near as sedentary as I was with the Former Day Job. Sitting on my duff for eight hours certainly gave me poor sitting posture and lazy-itis, that’s for sure. Here, I can expect to get at least some passive exercise in during an eight-hour shift. It makes up for the lack of time we used to have when we’d go for walks around the neighborhood after logging off for the day. Not that we don’t do that anymore, just that our walking tends to be on the weekends these days. Added to that, we let our YMCA membership lapse sometime ago.

I’ve been thinking, though, that I still need to get in better shape. I might be moving around, but I’m also a victim of lazy-itis on my days off. I’m not eating nearly as much junk food as I used to (though this triple whammy holiday season is certainly causing me to snack more!), but I’m not exactly burning enough calories, either. I’m getting older, so I’m not as flexible or as spry as I used to be, and certain parts are beginning to ache.

So what does this have to do with a writing blog? The obvious answer is that yes, I will definitely make it a point to move around more in 2026. Whether it’s a walk around the neighborhood or to our plot at the community garden, or making sure I do my daily stretches to keep me limber, I need to make time for it alongside my writing sessions. I don’t mind not exercising on a particularly busy work day where I’m going to be getting those steps in, but I should at least make stretching a daily priority, even if it is just for a few minutes a day.

Besides, a day where I’m moving physically is always a good day, because it usually gets my mind moving as well.

Chilling

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Image from Laid Back Camp

That is, feeling a bit cold lately. This is around the time of year when the temperature starts to dip in the Bay Area. Not quite the freezing cold of the Northeast that I grew up with, of course, but just enough where I need the extra layers and the knitted fingerless gloves. Just enough that we have to turn the heater on for a while.

This always reminds me of those days during the Belfry Years when I’d head down to the basement in the dead of winter to work on the Bridgetown Trilogy. I’d put on extra socks and aim the space heater directly towards the underside of the desk to keep my feet warm. I’d have a heavy shirt and a sweatshirt on. I was pretty stubborn about it because the only other place in the house to work was upstairs in the computer nook which was kind of uncomfortable as it was a raised area with only a stool to sit on.

Come to think of it, this is going to be our first winter at the New Digs, so I’m curious as to how cold it’ll get. Thankfully ours is a newly renovated place with central heating and no leaky windows, so at least it won’t be drafty, but I can already tell that it’s going to be just a wee bit chilly nonetheless. We’ve already had a few rainy days come through, and although it can get windy (our street is east-west and is a natural wind tunnel for coastal breezes coming off the Pacific Ocean), it remains warmish inside.

I suppose as long as I stay wrapped up and perhaps nursing a hot tea, I should be okay here in the new writing area!

I’ll be honest…

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I think one of the biggest things I’m nervous about with Theadia is not the dog fights, nor is it the physics of flight (both air and space) or even the science of how wormholes work. I’m playing as fast and loose with them as most other writers do. As long as there’s a consistent logic to it, and as long as I keep it within reason, then we’re golden.

It’s the fact that I could never get my head around the correct use of military rank.

Yes, silly, I know, especially since I have all the internet and multiple genre novels at my fingertips if I want to use them as guidelines. And considering some of my older relatives (including my dad) were in the armed forces for a time, you’d think I’d have had some kind of understanding about it. I just never quite got around to it.

I suppose before I release this out into the world I should have at least one talk with someone knowledgeable about it to some degree, at least to say “okay, here are the characters, are these the correct ranks I have for them, or should they be something different?” Put it this way: I have these characters doing exactly what I want them to; it’s not their jobs I’d need to fix, then, but whatever rank or title they have. I’m basing this story’s Space Force on a rather helpful and legitimate list I found online, so I can at least make an educated guess.

As long as I get it right before publication!

Seven or eight things

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One of the hardest parts of wanting to keep a daily habit of writing at 750Words (especially after a long hiatus) is trying to come up with something to write about in the first place. Some days I’m just fine and the ideas come easy to me, but other days I tend to overthink it and get nowhere. I’m also still trying to get out of the habit of using the site to write personal things that really should be offline in my moleskine notebook.

Something I’ve recently come up with to get around that temporary writer’s block is what I’ve been calling “Seven Or Eight Things”. Instead of trying to think of something I could stretch to roughly eight hundred words, I’ll split it up: I’ll write about seven or eight things for a hundred words. There’s no planned subject, I just let the words take me somewhere for a brief time.

Surprisingly, it’s been working even better than I’d expected! Over the last couple of days I’ve been talking about writing plans, thoughts on an album I happen to be listening to at that moment, or working through a creative problem I’m having. A few personal things still pop in, but those entries are actually in the minority this time out, and that’s perfect for what I’m trying to do here. Most of the time it’s something that pops into my head at that particular moment, so it could be anything!

Mind you, this is not a plan set in stone. It’s merely a process I’m trying out where I’m able to approach the daily words easier, but without the added stress of forcing myself to think of something to write about. If anything, it’s a reminder that I shouldn’t be so hard on myself when it comes to creativity. Leave the hyperfocus to the projects that need it; this is merely the warm-up exercise and stretch that I need beforehand.

And now for the next step…

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I am just a few short(ish) chapters away from completing this current revision of Theadia, which means two things. One, my next step in completing this novel is to go back again and fill in all the ‘WRITE THIS LATER’ scenes I blocked out. This one’s going to be a bit tricky, as a lot of them will feature a character that’s just as important but only works indirectly with the two main characters. They know of each other, but they’re never seen in the same room, let alone on any kind of communication device. He’s not the kind of character I normally write, either, but he’s just as important to the overall story, so I’m going to have to work out just what I want and need him to do.

The second thing? Well…I’m going to have to finally figure out how I’m going to end the dang thing. I’ll admit this is similar to how I had to deal with finishing The Balance of Light…that is, I kinda-sorta have an idea of how it ends, but no set plan on how to get there. In order to make it work, I’m going to have to take the time and plan it out so I can nail the landing. Which means I’m probably going to have to give it a few more re-re-re-rereads like I so often do. Hey, whatever works, yeah?

This novel’s history is rather similar to the history of the Bridgetown Trilogy in certain ways. I’ve returned to the ‘extended ensemble cast’ for starters, and it’s also a story that’s been given a from-the-ground-up worldbuilding process (minus a conlang this time out, though a few characters do affect a certain patois, somewhat inspired by a similar setup on the tv series The Expanse). It’s also a story that’s had a bit of a hiatus for varying reasons due to Real Life Stuff. I think this is partly why I have a soft spot for this project — it’s something I’ve worked on for an extended time and with patient care. It’s not a novel I can phone in.

It’ll be worth the wait, though.

Writing again…sort of

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I think it’s time to start writing again. The itch to do so has been constant lately.

Even though I’m working on Theadia (and doing a soft-start for the remaster of The Persistence of Memories), I’ve been itching to just write something new. I’m not sure what just yet, and I’m not going to force it. That, and I’ve sort of resurrected some of my writing habits again — noting word count in the small black moleskine calendar notebook, for instance. I’m not doing it every day of course, I’m merely entering it every now and again when the thought and the temptation strikes.

I know I talk about this here every now and again, and I admit sometimes I’m like a broken record (a skipping cd? a corrupted FLAC?) but it’s been an ongoing process that needs constant adjustment and tweaking. We writers sometimes get all meta about our process and it’s usually because we’re trying to figure out why our processes are the way they are, why they sometimes no longer work, and what we need to do to change them. That kind of thing never ends, I’m afraid, but it’s something I’m used to at this point.

As always, it’s just a matter of doing it. Once I start, the rest comes easier.